Married and dating

I placed two ads on craigslist…One was a real ad to truly try and find someone that is sick of the scammers, liars, cheaters, etc  and someone that is actually looking for just one person to meet and see where it leads. One was pretending to be married and not happy at home…I received only a couple of replies over several days, from the one that was real. I received over 66 emails in under 5 hours from men not happy at home and looking for someone. Some of the men that answered my fake ad looking for someone single, also answered my ad saying they were married. What was shocking to me, was that half of the men that emailed me that were married, attached a picture with their response. I started to email these men back and asked them how long it has been since they had sex with their partner, if they have answered others ads and how many other have they been with or are talking to.  I also asked them about their fantasies and what they liked. I also asked them if they were so unhappy why they stay in their marriage, if they have tried to talk to their partners and if they still loved them. Some claim that they still loved their partner, would never leave them, but needed to have that physical relationship that no longer existed in their relationship. Some claim that my ad  was the first ad they have ever answered, that they have talked to others, but never met them, met and either couldn’t go through with it or only had oral sex with the person they met. Others claimed that they have been with a few but it didn’t work. Some said they stay for the kids, others because they can’t afford to leave, some because they didn’t want to go through a divorce and their partner knows they are seeing others.  Most told me they have not talked to their partner, as they felt it would do no good, that they have grown to far apart. The ones that answered both my ads, I called them out on their lies. It floored me how many men answered my ad. I can’t believe how many are willing to cheat. I was in a sexless, loveless marriage, never went outside my marriage, as I felt it was wrong. I tried everything to make my marriage work. I tried talking to him, leaving with the kids to scare him to let him know I was serious and he didn’t care. I tried date nights, lingerie, spicing things up and was rejected every time and after a while I gave up trying. I did this for six plus years and my partner had no interest in trying to make it work. He even proposed that we continue as two people sharing a house, raising our children and do our own thing. That is when I was done! I did start talking to one married guy, who was honest and told me he was married, yet his wife is always going out somewhere and he thought she was having an affair. He asked if we could just talk and I agreed. He told me what had been happening in his marriage, and also what wasn’t happening in his marriage. He admitted that he let himself go and needed to lose some weight. I told him to get up early the next morning and do something nice that would make it easier for his wife in the morning. He agreed. I then told him to text her mid day and let her know he was thinking of her and hope she was having a good day. I told him he had to give her one compliment each day and do one thing that she normally does, without her asking him too. He did this and he noticed a change in her. She asked him to take a walk after dinner one night. Then she began to compliment him and talk to him more. I then told him to arrange a sitter and make a dinner reservation and text her mid day and tell her he got a babysitter and to be ready at 7pm to go out. She was thrilled and they had a great time. Yes both parties have to want to make it work for it to work. I was so happy it worked out for that couple. It also made me wonder how many couples if they would put their time and effort into their marriage, instead of searching personal ads to find someone new, would be able to save their marriages. I find it so mentally draining to try and date, especially when it seems so difficult to find someone that is truly looking for a relationship, is honest and not married! It makes it very difficult for the honest men and women out there, truly looking for a relationship. PLEASE FOLLOW ME IF YOU LIKE MY BLOG AND YOU WILL GET NOTIFIED WHEN THERE IS A NEW POST. THANKS!

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