Valentines Day….

Most of this is from last year with some changes, as I liked it. As this year I have a Valentine I guess you would say…I could careless if I went out tonight, as I feel things are over priced and not as good, as they try for volume. I will go enjoy and treat it like any other date. Hope everyone enjoys their day…

I have to say I was never a real big fan of Valentine’s Day. I have always felt it seemed silly that people needed a holiday, to make them tell and show people they love and care about, how they felt. The people in my life, shouldn’t need a holiday to tell and show me how they feel. I feel every day we should show and tell the people in our lives, how special they are. I’m not saying I want gifts and flowers every day. I feel there are many ways in which we can show and tell people just how special they are to us, without flowers and gifts. My kids one year ask me what I wanted and I told them, I would love it if you would clean my car. They thought I was kidding, but I wasn’t. I feel doing something for someone, making something, giving them a hug, taking a walk with them or sending them a simple text to tell them how special they are, is the most priceless gift you can give someone. I want to be surprised with flowers for no reason. A romantic dinner for no reason. A weekend away just the two of us. A night in, cuddled on the couch, watching a movie. I am a person that enjoys and appreciates the simple things in life. I feel the most precious and priceless things, aren’t things and cost little or no money. The most precious of all things someone can give, is their time. I feel anyone can spend a lot of money and put no effort or thought into a gift. The most precious gifts I have received were homemade and/or with a lot of work and thought put into them. One of the best gifts I received from my children, was a basket full of me things. It was all my favorite things I liked to do, gift cards for a manicure/pedicure, a massage, Starbucks and my favorite shower gel and lotion from Bath and Body Works. This year for Christmas my favorite gift was a mug the says “I Love You To The Moon And Back” from my kids, as I say that to them all the time. Another was a friend took me to dinner and dancing to celebrate my 50th birthday. It was a night of great conversation, company and laughs. I ate more than I should, danced more than I should and stayed out later than I should, but enjoyed myself and had fun. All of these were such sweet and thoughtful gifts. So everyone needs to show the special people in their lives, how special they are, not just because a holiday tells us to, but because we want too!

I have lost too many people in my life, way too soon and unexpectedly. Sometimes we don’t have as much time with the people closest to us, as we thought or would have wanted. Remember no tomorrow is guaranteed!  

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Why can’t everyone be up front and honest???

When getting divorced you sometimes realize or discover how much debt you really are in. I myself had a very eye opening experience, as to how much debt I really was in, when I started my divorce process. I also discovered how financially irresponsible, sneaky and dishonest my x was. He felt if you avoid a problem, it will just go away, when in reality, it makes it worse and in some cases, causes you even more debt.

I worked an average of 30 hours at a part time job in addition to my full time job. I don’t make a lot of money, but I’m a very budgeted person. I feel I am so much richer in family, friends, honesty and heart.

I have met man that when the check came, they claimed to just have discovered that they forgot or lost their wallet. Some the day of our date would text me they lost their wallet or their account was frozen, as someone hacked their account. Can these things happen, yes, but in most of these cases, I doubt it. I met a guy who explained he was laid off his job, started his own business and money was very tight for him. I had more respect for him, then someone making up a story, OK lying. I have met guys renting a room, who have moved back with their parents, moved in with his sibling or friends, as these men did not want to over extend their budget. I have more respect for them, for first being honest and second for being financially responsible. Some men are paying, alimony, child support and/or part of the household expenses that their children live in. I am an understanding woman, but come out and be honest from the beginning about your finances. If a woman will only be with you because of the size of your bank account, move on. I can tell you what is important is how a man treats me, if we have a physical, emotional connection and if I can have an intelligent conversation with him. If all you are looking for is sex, be honest, as I am sure there are some women out there that is all they are looking for, also. Everyone is entitled to what they like and want. I have had men say to me, do you know how long it has been since I had sex, I want it, I need it. My answer is well get to know me and in time if we connect that may happen, but don’t push the issue, as for me that’s a big turn off and if will be even longer before you have sex again.

Is it nice to have a man, be a gentleman, take you to dinner and treat, yes. We are in 2018, so I feel yes, in the beginning a gentleman should pay, but as time goes on, the relationship progresses, then maybe he pays for dinner and I pay for the movie or he treats one time and you treat another. I love to cook, so when we get to that point, then I would enjoy cooking for a man, especially if he cooks with me or even better yet, he cleans up 🙂

Just be honest, as I can’t speak for others, but for me that’s all I want and will have so much more respect for an honest man. These men, I feel, think we are stupid and are going to fall for their lines. I will admit, when I was first dating after my divorce I did, but live and learn!

Where are you and what are you doing?

In today’s world of technology we are always in constant touch. In today’s world of dating, relationship, etc., we can be in touch all the time. We are constantly being ask where we are, what we are doing and who are we with. We can say we are anywhere from still at work to out with friends or home, but how do they know that is where we really are, how do we know people are where they tell us they are. People can say they are in the comfort of their home relaxing, when they are out partying, or in a hotel room with someone. No matter what we say or where we say we are or who we say we are with, the person on the other end will have no choice but to believe us.

Is technology making things easier or more complicated? Do we really need to be in such constant touch with people? Some say technology has ruined us and relationships? Would love feedback on this and your thoughts……

Meeting NOT a date…..

Ok went on a meeting last night, yes I call them meetings not dates. It lasted 45 minutes and here is why….He doesn’t have a job, isn’t looking for a job, has to sell his house and going to buy a camper van and go from friend to friends driveway, has to quit drinking, diabetic and sugar out of control, has sued every employer he has ever worked for, that’s what he lives off, was just circumcised in October, can take a lot of pain, etc….People ask me why I will not meet for dinner the first time, this was 45 minutes, I couldn’t imagine sitting through dinner. It gets better, he insists on walking me to my car, I was nice I hugged him, thanked him for the coffee and he attacked my neck, I pushed him away and he went in for a full open mouth kiss. In what world did this guy think that this “meeting” went well???

I have decided I need to come up with a list of questions before I even meet a guy….here is my list….

1. Are you divorced and can you supply the JOD if needed?

2. Do you have a drivers license?

3. Do you own a car? Is that car in your possession?

4. Do you have your own place? Sleep on a friends couch? Sleep in your car or a van?

5. Do you do drugs?

6. Do you smoke pot?

7. Do you have a drinking problem?

8. What is your religion? Can you date and be in a relationship, other than with God in your religion?

9. Are you any kind of relationship with another?

10. Do you like animals? Are you allergic to dogs?

ME:

1. Yes

2. Yes

3. Yes and yes

4. Yes – No – No

5. No

6. No

7. No

8. Catholic and Yes

9. No

10. Yes love them and no

Living alone….

For the first time in my life I’m living alone. My son has moved to his girlfriends, as they are having a baby in May. My daughter is away at College. I’m not totally alone, I have my two dogs, so I’m not totally alone. It has been an adjustment for me and the dogs. I have to allow extra time in the morning to feed the dogs and let them out, before work. The dogs are use to my son coming home very late or being up late hours, so they have been waking me at all different hours. I will admit I feel exhausted, like when my kids were little. I’m sure they will get use to the new schedule in time, but as soon as they do, my daughter will be home in May from school lol. I was ordering my meals from a place that makes healthy, fresh meals, but they went out of business this week 😦 My son comes by during the day if he has time and lets the dogs out and sometimes takes a nap. I’m sure once my granddaughter arrives those naps will be more often lol. I sometimes forget that although I live alone, I do have windows and neighbors that can see in lol. I am enjoying the peace and quiet, but do miss my kids, sometimes. I will admit it is lonely at times, but for now I am enjoying it. I fill my time, keep busy, but my kids have always and will always come first!

A getaway

A get away to AC

A relaxing time hopefully

Some shopping during the day

Take time clear the cobwebs away

Enjoy a nice dinner and some romancing

Enjoy great music and some dancing

Try our luck at the slots

Have some drinks and shots

Return to the room when we are done

Enjoy each other and some bedroom fun

© 2018 Teri Fitzgerald

I want it to be you….

When I am down and feeling blue

I want you to be the one to ask what you can do

When I feel out of control with emotions

I want you to be the one there with devotion

When I need someone to lend me their ear

I want you to be the one to be there

When I need to vent I want you to be there for me

I want you to show me the future that I can’t see

When I need to be held and a hug

I want you to be the one to hold me so snug

I want you to not just be my lover but also my friend

I want you to be there for me from beginning to the end

When you need all the same

I want you to call out my name

© 2018 Teri Fitzgerald