Why can’t everyone be up front and honest???

When getting divorced you sometimes realize or discover how much debt you really are in. I myself had a very eye opening experience, as to how much debt I really was in, when I started my divorce process. I also discovered how financially irresponsible, sneaky and dishonest my x was. He felt if you avoid a problem, it will just go away, when in reality, it makes it worse and in some cases, causes you even more debt.

I worked an average of 30 hours at a part time job in addition to my full time job. I don’t make a lot of money, but I’m a very budgeted person. I feel I am so much richer in family, friends, honesty and heart.

I have met man that when the check came, they claimed to just have discovered that they forgot or lost their wallet. Some the day of our date would text me they lost their wallet or their account was frozen, as someone hacked their account. Can these things happen, yes, but in most of these cases, I doubt it. I met a guy who explained he was laid off his job, started his own business and money was very tight for him. I had more respect for him, then someone making up a story, OK lying. I have met guys renting a room, who have moved back with their parents, moved in with his sibling or friends, as these men did not want to over extend their budget. I have more respect for them, for first being honest and second for being financially responsible. Some men are paying, alimony, child support and/or part of the household expenses that their children live in. I am an understanding woman, but come out and be honest from the beginning about your finances. If a woman will only be with you because of the size of your bank account, move on. I can tell you what is important is how a man treats me, if we have a physical, emotional connection and if I can have an intelligent conversation with him. If all you are looking for is sex, be honest, as I am sure there are some women out there that is all they are looking for, also. Everyone is entitled to what they like and want. I have had men say to me, do you know how long it has been since I had sex, I want it, I need it. My answer is well get to know me and in time if we connect that may happen, but don’t push the issue, as for me that’s a big turn off and if will be even longer before you have sex again.

Is it nice to have a man, be a gentleman, take you to dinner and treat, yes. We are in 2018, so I feel yes, in the beginning a gentleman should pay, but as time goes on, the relationship progresses, then maybe he pays for dinner and I pay for the movie or he treats one time and you treat another. I love to cook, so when we get to that point, then I would enjoy cooking for a man, especially if he cooks with me or even better yet, he cleans up 🙂

Just be honest, as I can’t speak for others, but for me that’s all I want and will have so much more respect for an honest man. These men, I feel, think we are stupid and are going to fall for their lines. I will admit, when I was first dating after my divorce I did, but live and learn!

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I told him he can’t take you….

I told God he can never take you away

I told him many need you here to stay

I told him your kids and family needed you too

I told him he can not make so many would be sad and blue

I told him he has taken to many close to me

I told him for so many you are the key

I told him so many would be lost without you

I told him for so many what you do

I told him how special you are

I told him as a person you are way above par

I told him down here is where you need to be

I told him for this I want his guarantee

I told him you are not just special to others but also me

© 2018 Teri Fitzgerald.

Where are you and what are you doing?

In today’s world of technology we are always in constant touch. In today’s world of dating, relationship, etc., we can be in touch all the time. We are constantly being ask where we are, what we are doing and who are we with. We can say we are anywhere from still at work to out with friends or home, but how do they know that is where we really are, how do we know people are where they tell us they are. People can say they are in the comfort of their home relaxing, when they are out partying, or in a hotel room with someone. No matter what we say or where we say we are or who we say we are with, the person on the other end will have no choice but to believe us.

Is technology making things easier or more complicated? Do we really need to be in such constant touch with people? Some say technology has ruined us and relationships? Would love feedback on this and your thoughts……

Living alone….

For the first time in my life I’m living alone. My son has moved to his girlfriends, as they are having a baby in May. My daughter is away at College. I’m not totally alone, I have my two dogs, so I’m not totally alone. It has been an adjustment for me and the dogs. I have to allow extra time in the morning to feed the dogs and let them out, before work. The dogs are use to my son coming home very late or being up late hours, so they have been waking me at all different hours. I will admit I feel exhausted, like when my kids were little. I’m sure they will get use to the new schedule in time, but as soon as they do, my daughter will be home in May from school lol. I was ordering my meals from a place that makes healthy, fresh meals, but they went out of business this week 😦 My son comes by during the day if he has time and lets the dogs out and sometimes takes a nap. I’m sure once my granddaughter arrives those naps will be more often lol. I sometimes forget that although I live alone, I do have windows and neighbors that can see in lol. I am enjoying the peace and quiet, but do miss my kids, sometimes. I will admit it is lonely at times, but for now I am enjoying it. I fill my time, keep busy, but my kids have always and will always come first!

Make the most of each day….

I’m a little all over with this one, but I think you will get what I’m trying to say…..

I have said this many times, no tomorrow is guaranteed, so make every moment count, tell the people you love how you feel, forgive those that hurt you, don’t have any regrets, do what makes you happy. Live for today, forget yesterday it’s gone, don’t worry about tomorrow it hasn’t happened yet, but live for today, as it is the present. (I don’t know the exact quote or who said it sorry)

I watched four children, a husband, parents, sisters and many other love ones, say goodbye to their mother, wife, daughter, sister, etc., almost two weeks ago. Last year I said goodbye to a dear friend, who was like a brother. He was 44, he collapsed and died in front of his two young children. I have lost so many, way too soon. I am a person who was raised Catholic, always attended church, yet at times I have struggled, wondered why God would take such good people, yet let others still walk this earth. I wonder if it is his way of telling us to not hold grudges, let the little things go, tell the people we love that we love them, when we have the chance. Teach us to cherish every day, as we never know when it will be our love ones or our last day on this earth. To teach us to treat everyone and everything, as if it is.

They say when one life ends another begins. I wonder if that is true, as my son and his girlfriend told me they were expecting a child right after my uncle lost his battle to cancer. I know we are only on loan on this earth, but sadly some are here for a much shorter time than others. I try every day to live in the moment, as much as humanly possible, try to do the right thing by the people in my life, try not to have any regrets or to take any day for granted, it’s not always easy. I feel God will help guide us to be better people and to help others. I feel He doesn’t abandon us or hate us, if we mess up a little, as long as we learn from those missteps and try every day to be a better person.

So please try to remember to tell the people you love how you feel, hug your kids, your parents, loved ones and tell them you love them, treat people the way you want to be treated, cut toxic and drama filled people from your life and find what truly makes you happy in this life, as you only get one. Try not to waste what precious moments you have on this earth doing what doesn’t make you happy or with people that bring you unhappiness. They say life is short and sometimes some of us find out just how short it is, so live, love, enjoy and be happy.

Proud!!!

It isn’t easy raising teenagers alone, I was so stressed, wondered if I was doing it right, especially since I was constantly being told by some people I was wrong how I was doing things, after the divorce. Well my daughter has been facing her social anxiety fears at College, volunteering, working, going outside her comfort zone and really doing amazing. I found out yesterday that my daughter, who I was already so proud of, made the Deans Honor list. I am beyond proud of her! This for me tells me I did one great job with my children and I am truly blessed to have two amazing children! I am living all alone these days while she is at school. Well not all alone, I have my two dogs lol My son comes by and he also is so amazing! He does so much for me and I know when he becomes a dad in May he will be one amazing dad, as I raised him to be!